Validate the People You Appreciate the Most in Your Life

February 13, 2013

ID-10044374Dale Carnegie once commented on a study that was made on runaway wives. It was discovered that the main reasons wives ran away was a “lack of appreciation.” Carnegie then assumed if a study were made on runaway husbands, the reason would be quite the same. The reason, he surmised, is we often take our spouses so much for granted that we never let them know we appreciate them.

He went on to talk about a woman who was a member of one of his classes who, along with a group of other women in her church, were involved in a self-improvement program. She asked her husband to help her by listing six things he believed she could do to help her become a better wife. The husband was surprised by such a request. He replied, “Frankly, it would have been easy for me to list six things I would like to change about her—my heavens, she could have listed a thousand things she would like to change about me—but I didn’t. I said to her, ‘Let me think about it and give you an answer in the morning.’”

The next morning the husband got up very early and called the florist and had them send six red roses to his wife with a note saying: ‘I can’t think of six things I would like to change about you. I love you the way you are.’

When he arrived home that evening his wife greeted him at the door, almost in tears. Needless to say, he was extremely glad he had not criticized her as she had requested.

The following Sunday at church, after his wife had reported the results of her assignment, several women with whom she had been studying came up to the husband and said, ‘That was the most considerate thing I have ever heard.’ It was then that the husband realized the power of appreciation.

The point of the story is never take those closest to you in life for granted. Let them know how much they mean to you, and validate your love for them every day. It will not only make them feel better, it will make you feel better about yourself as well.


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